i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
