Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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