I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
i've created a new STD.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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