It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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