i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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