it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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