Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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