you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
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