Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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