i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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