you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Randomize
