I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I supernannyed him into submission
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
