its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
