I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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