Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
