haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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