i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
