Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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