Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
why is half of my head shaved?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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