Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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