Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
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