This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
