true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize