I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
