why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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