Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
