ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
