There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
