Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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