Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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