I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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