How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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