So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
