he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
