I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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