no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I just googled if crying burns calories
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
