so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
is wine microwaveable?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Randomize
