I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
