It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
