shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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