Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Randomize
