we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
