Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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