go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
