I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
