Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry donmiguel hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(607): View more from New York

Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.

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(540): View more from Virginia

I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.

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(605): View more from South Dakota

I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident

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(517): View more from Michigan

In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.

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(713): View more from Texas

he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

it's like my freshman wet dream come true

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(416): View more from Toronto

I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth

(201): View more from New Jersey

but he had pizza... so i win

(973): View more from New Jersey

I give up.

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