I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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