the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
