you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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