one word: firstdatebathroomanal
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Randomize
